THIS YEAR VS. LAST YEAR

Unlike many, my second year of teaching has not started off as well as my first year of teaching for several reasons. Last year, I was excited about teaching and was still hopeful that teaching might be my career of choice. This year, I have already concluded that teaching K12 is not a lifetime career for me. I am well aware of my strengths and weaknesses and am very honest with myself about my shortcomings. I know that my personality is definitely not a fit for teaching children. I don't have the type of patience required in order to be an effective teacher of children. I need to teach adults. While I know that there is a reason for me teaching in high school last year and even this year (whatever that may be), I also know that teaching is not for me.

This year has also not been as good as last year because of my class schedule. I only have one section of the only course that that I actually like to teach, and 5 sections of the subjects that I don't like (and even told my administrators that). I am not an actor. I am an open book. Whatever I think and feel, it is pretty obvious to the world. Therefore, my less than enthusiasm about what I teach is likely very apparent to my students. I can't make them be excited about learning something that I'm not excited about teaching.

On top of the above, I have about 60 more students this year as compared to last year. Therefore, in many ways, I have to operate my class very differently than last year. I spend much more time controlling behavior this year. Like I said, I don't have patience for that.

So, obviously I haven't had the typical the second year is better than the first experience. I'm sure a lot of it has to do with my attitude, but that's not an easy thing to change. Good thing is that I have done many things for longer periods of time than this that I don't like, so I'll continue to teach this year, and the students will hopefully continue to learn. At the same time, I'll be searchig and applying for my next job.